Jan 16

A nose for classic movies

I saw a promo just now for the Jose Ferrer version of “Cyrano de Bergerac” at 9 p.m. Central (10 Eastern) Sunday night on TCM, and I happily set my DVR.

There have been a number of fine versions of Cyrano, both in something like its original form and in modern-day adaptations. Kevin Kline gave a great performance of the play on PBS’s “Great Performances”, opposite Jennifer Garner, while Steve Martin’s “Roxanne” was a likable adaptation set among firefighters in the Pacific Northwest, with the lovely Daryl Hannah.

But nobody, and I mean nobody, beats Jose Ferrer in the 1950 movie version. Arrogant and witty, heartbroken and lonely, it’s one of the best performances in movie history.

I think most people are familiar with the story, which — on top of all the official adaptations — has been made a pop culture reference in numerous sitcoms and what have you. Cyrano is a genius, and a hero, but he has a huge, protruding, Pinocchio-like nose. He pines for the lovely Roxane, but while she is fond of him she is oblivious to his true, deeper feelings, and she even asks him to look after her suitor, a young soldier named Christian. Christian, also oblivious to Cyrano’s true feelings, is self-conscious and asks Cyrano to use his considerable talents as a poet to help Christian woo Roxane.

There’s wit, action, romance and pathos. A great, great movie, not to be missed.

My favorite scene, which is also recreated in Steve Martin’s version, is when someone makes a rude and not-very-clever joke about Cyrano’s nose and Cyrano (who is named C.D. Bales in the Steve Martin version) puts him in his place by coming up with dozens of much funnier nose jokes.

Jan 29

It’s a nice day to start again

For some of you, this will be old news, in which case, accept my apologies and move on. But for others … get ready for a musical experience that will rock your world.

It’s called “Microsoft Songsmith.”

It happened like this: the research labs at Microsoft had an idea for a new piece of software. The user could sing a song and record it on their computer, and then Songsmith would analyze the vocal track and create an instrumental backing to it, perfectly in synch, and with an appropriate introduction. Even musical novices and American Idol-wannabees could “write” their own songs.

Somehow, the execution was not up to the original concept. The program sometimes makes bizarre assumptions about to what genre a particular vocal track is supposed to belong. The software was made available for download, and quickly became the object of ridicule.

Then, someone decided to try an experiment. People with more sonic knowledge than you or I can easily use various filters and equalizers to create a track with just the vocals from a commercially-released song. What if you isolated the vocals from a song like “Roxanne” (hat tip to Jay Voorhees) and then fed those vocals into Microsoft Songsmith? Would Songsmith’s accompaniment sound anything like the original version? Or would it be a cheesy, surreal departure from the original?

And what about … this?