Every now and then, America produces a great leader — a person of vision, courage, and integrity. Until that leader shows up, why not elect Dave Barry as our president?

– from the official campaign web site, which still lists the date as “2004.” But, make no mistake about it, he’s running again in 2008.

Here is 2/5 of Dave’s stirring Contract With America:

1. If I am elected, within 100 days of taking the oath of office, I will return from vacation to check the mail.

2. Unless I am winning at the slot machines.

Honestly, how can you not vote for him?